The views and opinions expressed in this piece are the author’s and do not necessarily represent the position of Positive Women’s Network – USA.

by: Naimah Oneal

March 8, 2021

My name is Naimah O’Neal, and I have been living with HIV since 1992. Twenty-seven years! I sometimes still find it hard to believe. If someone had asked me twenty-seven years ago could I foresee being the woman that I am today, I would have said no way.  Today I use my voice as a woman of color to bring a face to this virus. With this first blog, I wanted to share a poem that I wrote a year ago to express how HIV criminalization impacts my life. The poem is entitled: Who’s sleeping in My BED with ME! I am not asking you to understand or accept the words, just know that I fear the world more than you should fear me.

The life that I feel with HIV can change depending on who needs Me!

My children and family love me, so HIV is great for Me!

On my job, HIV is a mixed bag full of questions and sympathy for me. Let’s face it, people are people. They have questions in their mind about how I obtained it. This is an educational moment for ME!

Going out with friends is a piece of cake for me because having fun is more important than HIV for ME!

So some people are saying “Then girl! WHAT THE HELL IS THE PROBLEM?!” I must say wanting to love or be loved by a man is something you take for granted because that’s hard for Me!

HIV criminalization has become a landmine, where walking and talking can blow-up in your face.  
Dating becomes a question mark about When, How, and If I tell.

Having a full-time job and getting some dick could create jail time and a spot on the 11 o’clock news.
Even if you disclose!

A hospital stay for the lucky ones not put in their grave by an ass-hole who said “baby a condom takes away from me feeling your juices”. Really!! 

Frankly, I am tired of being the one on the hook for two adults having SEX!!! Say it with ME, people’s personal responsibility!!!

Life for me with HIV criminalization is like an aunt who said just keep your legs close, but her son is trying to open them.
Like people who want their cake and eat it too; like a pastor who has three families in different states or like number 45.

IT JUST MAKES NO SENSE.

My life with HIV criminalization can make me make better choices, but it can also, in its present condition, turn my life upside down.

Because an asshole thinks the three letters H.I.V. will give him control over ME!!!