March 22, 2016 by Christina Carta
Originally posted on A Girl Like Me Blog (The Well Project)–reposted with permission
Do you ever have doubts in your relationship? Do you find yourself at times just talking to the wall? One of the biggest challenges we experience in relationships is that we are all different. Although you are with someone or you are trying to get to know someone for a possible relationship, these are ideas to help you have a better relationship. Life itself is challenging–however, life would honestly be dull if we were all the same. You need to accept differences between each other. I know sometimes we want or feel like we want our partner to be more like us. The worst thing you can do is push yourself on your partner. Remember your partner had a life before you entered it. One of the most common reasons for the downfall of a relationship is one partner’s need to control the other.
It takes time for one partner to start taking the other partner for granted, or control them. And at the same time, your partner can never control you unless you give them that chance. If you’ve ever felt like your partner is trying to control you, even about small things you do, this is the time to put a stop to it before things get a lot worse. One of the biggest problems with communication is that we make the assumption that the other person has understood the message we are trying to get across. We need to make sure and NOT assume. Listening and understanding what others communicate to us is the most important part of successful conversation. Trust is learned and earned. You’ll grant it, over time, to those who act supportive, dependable, and trustworthy. Let your partner know and see the real you. This will let your partner see the good and the bad, even it reflects your insecurities. “If you’re open and self-revealing, your partner is more likely to be more open with you.”
Too much togetherness can ruin a perfect relationship. Learn to give a little space. If you are living together, plan one night a week out with friends or your family. If you decide to do this make sure you come home of course because if you don’t there will be problems when you come home. Learn to enjoy that time away but show respect and come home at a decent hour. Knowing how to give space may be difficult, especially at the beginning. We must all understand that being close to each other and making time is important, but to come closer and become better individuals, you have to understand that relationships need space to grow and bloom. Your spouse or partner should be your best friend, and friends enjoy spending time with one another. If you and your partner like different activities try to decide on something you can do together.
This could be a learning experience for both of you. Try something new and exciting together something completely different .Maybe skydiving , mountain climbing, or bungee jumping. Let your partner know you love them today as you did yesterday. Surprise them with breakfast in bed, Leave little love notes around the house expressing your love .Personally I feel sometimes if the money is all good and bills are all paid up for the month, a surprise getaway for the weekend would be nice. My friends even for just one night away can be a big boost and bring life back into your relationship.